Okay, so you're a penguin in bondage type of gay for Queer Eye dudes.

Whoa.. Where did you get teh "Penguin in Bondage" thing?

First, think of the chicken farmer in Napoleon Dynamite:

"Arch, I have absolutely no idea what you just said. "

I am sure I should be insulted, but I have no idea exactly why.

I didn't think too many people knew about Penguins in Bondage

http://www.myspace.com/free_el_pinguino

I now remember the penguin in bondage thing, but I still have no idea what he meant.

Prepare to be Zapped. Warning for the faint of heart.

She's just like a Penguin in Bondage, boy
Oh yeah, Oh yeah, Oh . . .
Rennenhenninnahenninnenninahennn
Way over on the wet side
Of the bed (Knirps for moisture)

Just like the mighty Penguin
Flappin' her eight ounce wings
(The Penguin Flap)

Lord, you know it's all over
If she come atcha on the strut & wrap 'em all around yer head
Flappin' her eight ounce wings, flappinumm

She's just like a Penguin in Bondage, boy

Shake up the pale-dry
Ginger ale

Tremblin' like a Penguin
When the battery fail

Lord, you must be havin' her jumpin' through a hoopa real fire
With some Kleenex wrapped around a coat-hang wire

She's just like a Penguin in Bondage, boy
Oh yeah, Oh yeah, Oh . . .
Rennenhenninnahenninneninahenn
Howlin' over to some
Antarcticulated moon

In the frostbite nite
With her flaps gone white
Shriekin' as she spot the hoop across the room
(Everytime she sees the hoop)

You know it must be a Penguin bound down
If you hear that terrible screamin' and there ain't no other
Birds around

She's just like a Penguin in Bondage, boy
Oh yeah, Oh yeah, Oh . . .
She's just like a Penguin in Bondage, boy
Oh yeah, Oh yeah, Oh . . .
Rennenhenninnahenninneninahennnn
Aw, you must be careful
Not to leave her straps
TOO LOOSE

'Cause she just might box yer dog
She just might box yer doggie
An' leave you a dried-up dog biscuit . .

No deep meaning here buds.

WIll it surprise you to know that this did not help?

Actually, you have an interesting paradox here. Allow me to explain:

Led Zepelin and Jethro Tull went on a long US tour together back in the 70's and the folks in Led Zepelin grew to hate the folks in Jethro Tull. They cam to refer to them as "Jethro Dull". I kind of agree.

Jethro Tull was OK, but not even in the same league as Zepelin.

I am a warped old dude, man, and my humor is twisted, not quite Twisted Sister, but twisted by the likes of Zappa, Tull, Angel, Steppenwolf, and many others.

I'm well aware of the Zappa song...

I just didn't think most other people were aware. When El Pinguino came to life at the U of I law school... Not ONE person got the "Penguins in Bondage" joke.

You are the first I have ever heard make a reference to the Zappa song.