how not to offend people during the holidays
 

You can't say "Merry Christmas" because this might offend a non-Christian, or someone who just plain hates the American way.

We all know that. We don't want to upset the Jews, the Muslims, the Kwanzaa-African-Americans, the Buddhists, the Shintoists, and the agnostics and atheists.

But there is still one group we can squat, grunt, and take a giant crap on: the Jehovah's Witnesses. Who do not believe in celebrating any holiday.

So the next time you say "Happy Holidays" you can take special pleasure in the fact that you are NOT PC, that you are a hateur, taking perverse delight in sticking it to...well, someone.

Or, you could just say Merry Christmas and know that if people are offended, it's because they choose to be offended.

But I like that it sticks it to JWs. It's a bonus.

I have very little trouble adjusting my holiday wishes based on the audience I am addressing. I guess I'm just sensitive like that.

The managing partner at my previous law firm gives holiday hams to all the attorneys - including the Jewish ones (one of his partners is Jewish, too).

The Jewish attorneys are fine with it - they actually all eat ham anyway.

I'm careful to send appropriate cards (i.e., not Christmas) to my Jewish and other friends. It's no big deal.

I find lately I'm more likely to offend people by complaining about how hard it is to gain weight.