cougarobgon,
That is exactly the worry I have had about taking time off from the church. My family is of the highest importance to me and I do not want them following in my footsteps in regard to this decision, but I was seriously going to lose it if I didn't do something. Luckily my children are way beyond the diaper stage, but I know exactly what you mean about my wife being alone at church. My kids are 17, 16, 14, 9, and 7 so they are pretty independent at church anyway. I decided that I needed to make this decision for my own sanity, and I have no regrets at this point.
As far as considering your comments criticism, nothing could be further from the truth. Your opinion probably would have bothered me 6 months ago, but I am so fully beat down and worn out that I simply don't get my feelings hurt anymore. I actually appreciate your comments, and you are certainly right about much of what you wrote. It's just that I can no longer pretend that everything is okay when it clearly is not.
I am so happy that you had a loving ward that showed care and concern for you and your family. Unfortunately I do not have the same feelings of acceptance in my ward. I told my bishop about my feelings of not being needed in church, and he became very upset about it. He showed sincere concern for me, and not just my eternal salvation. He was mostly worried about my ability to function in the real world being under so much stress. He asked me if there was anything he could do to make me feel more comfortable in church, and I said there really was not at this point. I told him my decision is final, but I appreciate his concern.
Anyway, the bishop did ask me if I would go in and see him in a month - I told him I would, and I am looking forward to it. Hopefully things will improve in my life and I can return to full activity in the not too distant future. Thanks for your comments.
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