I don't think it is about being capable of having a long distance relationship. The request was made on valentines day. It also is the therapist in me that is thinking about the person sending the request. Is this a moment of weekness that should not be fed into? What does reconnecting with an ex do for her and her current relationship to her husband? Just seems to be odd to get a friend request of this kind on Valentines day.
I do agree that giving you spouse access to your social networking accounts is a good idea. That is how it is with me and my wife. Secret communications with others can be the start of distrust.
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