02-20-2006, 04:59 AM | #1 |
Charon
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: In the heart of darkness (Provo)
Posts: 9,564
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Contemplating a crime
Our neighbor's dog had puppies a month or so ago. The doghouse is just across the fence and is adjacent to our bedroom window. Every night those damn dogs start yelping at about 3:00 am. Then again about every hour after that. My wife and I are both getting seriously sleep deprived. We would wear earplugs, but our daughter has a sleepwalking habit and we don't dare become deaf for fear that she would sleepwalk out the front door. The other night I was lying in bed and I realized that I had a newfound respect for Cruella Deville. I really believe that she is not a bad person; just misunderstood.
So, I appeal to you, fellow CG'ers. Give me some ideas. How can I bump off the doggies and not make the police blotter? Any chemicals you can think of that would be tough to trace? Any way of snuffing them out that would not make too much noise? Signed: Sleepless in Happy Valley |
02-20-2006, 05:07 AM | #2 |
Junior Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Arizona
Posts: 9
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Save yourself the jail time, and just go tell your neighbors that their dogs are keeping you awake, and that they need to do something about it...
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I\'ll be taking these Huggies...and whatever cash you got |
02-20-2006, 05:47 AM | #3 |
I must not tell lies
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 5,103
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Get a pit bull.
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02-20-2006, 03:51 PM | #4 | |
Charon
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: In the heart of darkness (Provo)
Posts: 9,564
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Quote:
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02-20-2006, 05:06 PM | #5 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: the far corner of my mind
Posts: 8,711
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I had a friend whose neighbor's dog kept gettinf into his garbag. He kept complaining to the neighboir to no avail. In order to solve the issue he manufactured a special meatball which was made of raw meat and d-con rat poiison. He then left it in his garbage can. The dog got into the garbage, was deighted to find raw meat, and then was no more.
No humane, I suppose, but it was effective. |
02-21-2006, 03:02 AM | #6 |
Charon
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: In the heart of darkness (Provo)
Posts: 9,564
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Good news folks. The neighbors finally got rid of the puppies today. Woohoo!
FWIW, I wouldn't have had the heart to knock 'em off. Ah yes, we can finally get a good night's rest. |
02-21-2006, 12:59 PM | #7 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Memphis freakin' Tennessee!!!!!
Posts: 4,530
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Bummer!
I just happen to know someone who specializes in exactly these kinds of sticky situations. "I see many dogs on my mail route. I'll bet there's not one type of mutt or mongrel I haven't run across. If you ask me, they have no business living amongst us. Vile, USELESS BEASTS . . ." NEWMAN!
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Give 'em Hell, Cougars!!! Religion rises inevitably from our apprehension of our own death. To give meaning to meaninglessness is the endless quest of all religion. When death becomes the center of our consciousness, then religion authentically begins. Of all religions that I know, the one that most vehemently and persuasively defies and denies the reality of death is the original Mormonism of the Prophet, Seer and Revelator, Joseph Smith. |
02-21-2006, 02:42 PM | #8 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: the far corner of my mind
Posts: 8,711
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BTW, just to show my age, everytime I read the subject line of this thread (contemplating a crime) it is followed by Al Stewart's voice singing "In The Year of the Cat." Does this happen to anyone else?
(you know ". . . strolling through thew crowd like peter Lorry contemplating a crime, in the Year of the Cat") Also btw, Al Stewart lives not too far from where I do these days and his kids go to a local high school and he puts on a benefit concert there every so often. Weird. |
02-21-2006, 03:45 PM | #9 |
Board Pinhead
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: In the basement of my house, Murray, Utah.
Posts: 15,941
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Al Stewart is one of my favorites, though I had forgotten about that line from Year of the Cat. And yes, I'm old enough to remember that song when it was first released.
I'm now going to have to get out his greatest hits CD and listen to it.
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"The beauty of baseball is not having to explain it." - Chuck Shriver "This is now the joke that stupid people laugh at." - Christopher Hitchens on IQ jokes about GWB. |
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