02-27-2008, 04:02 PM | #1 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Happy Valley, PA
Posts: 1,866
|
I worry for my daughter
She's got some time before she'd be the right age, but I'm not so sure I want her hearing some of the lessons written for LDS young women.
Compare, for instance, these two lessons on marriage. This one, directed towards Young Men, talks about choosing an Eternal Companion. (active voice, implies agency) http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.js...ontentLocale=0 The most comparable YW lesson is entitled Preparing to become an eternal companion. (passive voice, limited agency) http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.js...ontentLocale=0 There are lots of interesting comparisons to be made. I offer just a couple of points: For the males, one of the things they can do to become a good marriage partner is, "Becoming educated or trained in order to be a good provider." For the females, it's almost all about homemaking. There are a couple of allusions to higher education, but the allusions encourage females to gain knowledge, training, and skills that will help them with mothering and homemaking. Even the introductory story about the girl who comes home to spend Christmas vacation fails to say "she was at college." There's nothing wrong with being a good homemaker or having child psychology skills (I wish I had them). There is something wrong with not encouraging our young women to seek educational and professional fulfillment, should they so desire. I know there are quotes aplenty, especially from Golden Boy Hinckley about women getting educations - and I applaud them - but as long as this type of bias permeates the instruction manuals (which many say are next to scripture in import and inspiration) I'm going to be leery. My friends with girls this age say they often come home from church and "undo" what's been taught, using the opportunity to teach the girls to think for themselves and not believe everything they hear. Great, but that's a silver lining in a really dark cloud (IMO). Those of you with daughters, is this an issue? How have you dealt with it? [This is my 1,000th post. Hooray for me.]
__________________
I hope for nothing. I fear nothing. I am free. - Epitaph of Nikos Kazantzakis (1883-1957) |
02-27-2008, 04:04 PM | #2 |
Assistant to the Regional Manager
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: The Orgasmatron
Posts: 24,338
|
Teach her otherwise and she'll overcome those biases. No need to worry, except if you teach her those preferences she may resent the cultural preferences.
__________________
Ἓν οἶδα ὅτι οὐδὲν οἶδα |
02-27-2008, 04:06 PM | #3 | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,371
|
Quote:
However, I'm personally pretty laid back, so I'd probably laugh about it, and tell my daughter that I personally feel an education is important, and I expect her to go to school. If she decides to get married and become a homemaker, and not finish school, I'll support her. |
|
02-27-2008, 04:07 PM | #4 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 8,596
|
Maybe the lesson manuals have yet to catch up to the present-day teachings. I'm not sure anything moves slower in the church than curricula.
__________________
"Have we been commanded not to call a prophet an insular racist? Link?" "And yes, [2010] is a very good year to be a Democrat. Perhaps the best year in decades ..." - Cali Coug "Oh dear, granny, what a long tail our puss has got." - Brigham Young |
02-27-2008, 04:09 PM | #5 | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 5,084
|
Quote:
I have on more than one occasion had a child tell me something their Bishop has said and the child questioned. I have told the child the decision is up to them, not the Bishop. They should weigh his counsel, but the final decision is their's because the Bishop is speaking in generalitites. There are probably others who would counsel their kids to follow exactly what the Bishop said. Last edited by BYU71; 02-27-2008 at 04:11 PM. |
|
02-27-2008, 04:09 PM | #6 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Happy Valley, PA
Posts: 1,866
|
Except the clock during High Council talks in Sacrament meeting.
__________________
I hope for nothing. I fear nothing. I am free. - Epitaph of Nikos Kazantzakis (1883-1957) |
02-27-2008, 04:12 PM | #7 | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 8,596
|
Quote:
Yet, we were all taught that getting an education was important, and all of my sisters got degrees, a couple of them getting married while in school.
__________________
"Have we been commanded not to call a prophet an insular racist? Link?" "And yes, [2010] is a very good year to be a Democrat. Perhaps the best year in decades ..." - Cali Coug "Oh dear, granny, what a long tail our puss has got." - Brigham Young |
|
02-27-2008, 04:14 PM | #8 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: The People's Republic of Monsanto
Posts: 3,085
|
My home is the primary place for instruction of this sort. Church is secondary, and this has been reality for my son from day one.
I'm hoping this will help.
__________________
"Do not despise the words of prophets, but test everything; hold fast to what is good; " 1 Thess. 5:21 (NRSV) We all trust our own unorthodoxies. |
02-27-2008, 04:35 PM | #9 | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 1,431
|
Actually, here is the lesson that should worry you:
Quote:
|
|
02-27-2008, 04:40 PM | #10 | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Clinton Township, MI
Posts: 3,126
|
Quote:
__________________
Its all about the suit |
|
Bookmarks |
|
|