Worst lyrics all time? - cougarguard.com — unofficial BYU Cougars / LDS sports, football, basketball forum and message board

BarbaraGordon · 11-09-2006, 09:57 PM

Just plain weird:
"I don't think that I can take it 'cause it took so long to bake it..."
MacArthur Park, Richard Harris

Failed attempt at poetic imagery:
"bubblegum tongue"???
Your body is a wonderland, John Mayer

runner up:
"The morning sun is shining like a red rubber ball" (Apologies to Paul Simon, who wrote the song)
Red Rubber Ball, Cyrkle

Worst use of repetition:
"Tell me have you ever really, really, really, really, really, really...."
Have you ever loved a woman? Bryan Adams

grammatical breakdown:
"No I cannot forget from where it is that I come from"
Small Town, John (Cougar) Mellancamp

overall tripe:
Wake Up Little Susie, Everly Brothers

TheSizzle36 · 11-09-2006, 10:10 PM

Absolute worst famous athlete reference:

Nelly Furtado's "Promiscuous Girl"

Hey is that the truth or are you talking trash
Is your game M.V.P. like Steve Nash

I like the beat to that song, but the lyrics are so incredibly horrible that it makes that song so painful to listen to.

hyrum · 11-09-2006, 10:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lisa.Kinzer

Any nominations?

overall tripe:
Wake Up Little Susie, Everly Brothers

Tripe award should go to "Muskrat Love"
Runner up
"Popcorn Popping on the Apricot Tree"

MikeWaters · 11-09-2006, 10:26 PM

This is a good one. I would play it really loud to annoy Farrah.

Quote:

Havin' my baby
What a lovely way of sayin'
How much you love me
Havin' my baby
What a lovely way of sayin'
What you're thinkin' of me
I can see it, face is glowin'
I can see in your eyes
I'm happy you know it

[Both:]
That you're havin' my baby

[Paul:]
You're the woman I love
And I love what it's doin' to ya

[Both:]
Havin' my baby

[Paul:]
You're a woman in love
And I love what's goin' through ya

[Paul:]
The need inside you
I see it showin'
Whoa, the seed inside ya
Baby, do you feel it growin'
Are you happy you know it
That you're

[Both:]
Havin' my baby

[Odia:]
I'm a woman in love
And I love what it's doin' to me

[Both:]
Havin' my baby

[Odia:]
I'm a woman in love
And I love what's goin' through me

[Paul:]
Didn't have to keep it
Wouldn't put ya through it
You could have swept it from you life
But you wouldn't do it
No, you wouldn't do it

[Both:]
And you're havin' my baby

[Odia:]
I'm a woman in love
And I love what it's doin' to me

[Both:]
Havin' my baby

[Odia:]
I'm a woman in love
And I love what's goin' through me

[Paul:]
Havin' my baby (havin' my baby)
What a lovely way of sayin'
How much you love me

[Paul:]
Havin' my baby
(havin' my baby)

[Odia:]
I'm a woman in love
And I love what's goin' through me

BarbaraGordon · 11-09-2006, 10:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hyrum

Tripe award should go to "Muskrat Love"
Runner up
"Popcorn Popping on the Apricot Tree"

I have to admit, I did consider Muskrat Love...

Jeff Lebowski · 11-09-2006, 10:48 PM

So many choices, so little time. Amen to all the above.

Just about anything out of Nashville these days is automatically a contender. But you have to give a lifetime achievement award to Neil Diamond. Mr. Cheese himself. Here are some of my "favorites":

Porcupine Pie

Words and Music by Neil Diamond

Porcupine pie, porcupine pie, porcupine pie,
Vanilla soup, a double scoop please.
No, maybe I want, maybe I won't, maybe I will.
The titti fruit, with fruity blue cheese.

Ah, but porcupine pie, porcupine pie, porcupine pie,
Don't let it get on your jeans, I know it sounds a little strange,
but you got to eat it with gloves--or your hands will turn green.

Ah, but porcupine pie, porcupine pie, porcupine pie,
It weaves its way through my dreams,
And I do believe I'm gonna have one and leave enough room for dessert,
chicken ripple ice cream.

HEARTLIGHT

Written by Neil Diamond, Burt Bacharach and Carole Bayer Sager

Come back again
I want you to stay next time
'Cause sometimes the world ain't kind
When people get lost like you and me
I just made a friend
A friend is someone you need
But now that he had to go away
I still feel the words that he might say
Turn on your heartlight
Let it shine whereever you go
Let it make a happy glow
For all the world to see
Turn on your heartlight
In the middle of a young boy's dream
Don't wake me up too soon
Gonna take a ride across the moon
You and me
He's lookin' for home
'Cause everyone needs a place
And home's the most excellent place of all
And I'll be right here if you should call me
Turn on your heartlight
Let it shine whereever you go
Let it make a happy glow
For all the world to see
Turn on your heartlight
In the middle of a young boy's dream
Don't wake me up too soon
Gonna take a ride across the moon
You and me
Turn on you heartlight now
Turn on you heartlight now

BarbaraGordon · 11-09-2006, 11:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jeff Lebowski

So many choices, so little time. Amen to all the above.
But you have to give a lifetime achievement award to Neil Diamond. Mr. Cheese himself. Here are some of my "favorites":

How could I forget Neil?? Clearly an oversight. Another good one:

"I am I said to no one there and no one heard at all not even the chair..."

good stuff.

creekster · 11-09-2006, 11:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lisa.Kinzer

How could I forget Neil?? Clearly an oversight. Another good one:

"I am I said to no one there and no one heard at all not even the chair..."

good stuff.

You stole my thunder. Many of the other goofy lyrics are self-consciously goofy and so I am not sure if they really count. But this gem, the utter isolation, described by the poignant refernce to unfeeling furniture, is so bad precisely becasue it is so earnestly sincere. Neil could really craft a nice pop tune but man did some of his lyrics stink.

ute4ever · 11-09-2006, 11:15 PM

Neil Diamond was the worst. He would say anything just to make it rhyme.

Quote:

I am, I said ... to no one there ... and no one heard ... not even the chair

Sleeping in EQ · 11-09-2006, 11:22 PM

It does not get any sappier than this song. Every single line is a worn out cliche. It's like they wrote it badly on purpose.

A girl in HS wanted to make this "our song." I should have just ran.

If you pay attention while listening to this, you'll notice that your pancreas has stopped working.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BOOT4qyupDE

11-09-2006, 09:57 PM	#1
BarbaraGordon Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Gotham City Posts: 7,157	Worst lyrics all time? Just plain weird: "I don't think that I can take it 'cause it took so long to bake it..." MacArthur Park, Richard Harris Failed attempt at poetic imagery: "bubblegum tongue"??? Your body is a wonderland, John Mayer runner up: "The morning sun is shining like a red rubber ball" (Apologies to Paul Simon, who wrote the song) Red Rubber Ball, Cyrkle Worst use of repetition: "Tell me have you ever really, really, really, really, really, really...." Have you ever loved a woman? Bryan Adams grammatical breakdown: "No I cannot forget from where it is that I come from" Small Town, John (Cougar) Mellancamp overall tripe: Wake Up Little Susie, Everly Brothers Last edited by BarbaraGordon; 04-24-2007 at 12:25 AM.

11-09-2006, 10:48 PM	#6
Jeff Lebowski Charon Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: In the heart of darkness (Provo) Posts: 9,564	So many choices, so little time. Amen to all the above. Just about anything out of Nashville these days is automatically a contender. But you have to give a lifetime achievement award to Neil Diamond. Mr. Cheese himself. Here are some of my "favorites": Porcupine Pie Words and Music by Neil Diamond Porcupine pie, porcupine pie, porcupine pie, Vanilla soup, a double scoop please. No, maybe I want, maybe I won't, maybe I will. The titti fruit, with fruity blue cheese. Ah, but porcupine pie, porcupine pie, porcupine pie, Don't let it get on your jeans, I know it sounds a little strange, but you got to eat it with gloves--or your hands will turn green. Ah, but porcupine pie, porcupine pie, porcupine pie, It weaves its way through my dreams, And I do believe I'm gonna have one and leave enough room for dessert, chicken ripple ice cream. HEARTLIGHT Written by Neil Diamond, Burt Bacharach and Carole Bayer Sager Come back again I want you to stay next time 'Cause sometimes the world ain't kind When people get lost like you and me I just made a friend A friend is someone you need But now that he had to go away I still feel the words that he might say Turn on your heartlight Let it shine whereever you go Let it make a happy glow For all the world to see Turn on your heartlight In the middle of a young boy's dream Don't wake me up too soon Gonna take a ride across the moon You and me He's lookin' for home 'Cause everyone needs a place And home's the most excellent place of all And I'll be right here if you should call me Turn on your heartlight Let it shine whereever you go Let it make a happy glow For all the world to see Turn on your heartlight In the middle of a young boy's dream Don't wake me up too soon Gonna take a ride across the moon You and me Turn on you heartlight now Turn on you heartlight now __________________ "... the arc of the universe is long but it bends toward justice." Martin Luther King, Jr.

11-09-2006, 11:22 PM	#10
Sleeping in EQ Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: The People's Republic of Monsanto Posts: 3,085	It does not get any sappier than this song. Every single line is a worn out cliche. It's like they wrote it badly on purpose. A girl in HS wanted to make this "our song." I should have just ran. If you pay attention while listening to this, you'll notice that your pancreas has stopped working. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BOOT4qyupDE __________________ "Do not despise the words of prophets, but test everything; hold fast to what is good; " 1 Thess. 5:21 (NRSV) We all trust our own unorthodoxies.

11-09-2006, 10:10 PM	#2
TheSizzle36 Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 3,786	Absolute worst famous athlete reference: Nelly Furtado's "Promiscuous Girl" Hey is that the truth or are you talking trash Is your game M.V.P. like Steve Nash I like the beat to that song, but the lyrics are so incredibly horrible that it makes that song so painful to listen to.