Repentance and confession - cougarguard.com — unofficial BYU Cougars / LDS sports, football, basketball forum and message board

Fumamota McChopperdave · 04-02-2006, 01:23 AM

One thing that I've always wondered about, why is it necessary to confess to a bishop/GA a sin that one has already overcome, prayed about, and felt a confirming spirit that he has been forgiven?

Personal story: before the mish in my youth, I was a lover of the ganja and the pale ale. It kept me out of the mission field for awhile; I continued to attend church, but felt continually niggled by guilt that I had a horrible habit that was holding me back spiritually. I struggled for a couple of years, and finally put the stuff away.
I read the BOM, found myself spiritually, gained a real testimony, and decided to file mission papers. It had been 8 months since I'd touched anything when during pre-paper sending bishop interviews I disclosed my Word o' wisdom breakages in my youth. I was ashamed to admit these things I'd hidden from the ward community for years. I felt awful about things... and the bishop responded by giving me the b**** slapping of my life. He said that I had no honor, and that if he had his way I wouldn't be allowed to serve a mission. He laid into me like no other.
I told myself after that experience, never again. Before the interview, I had felt that I had worked on the problem and found repentance and help through the spirit. Afterwards, I felt like Judas. I decided that from then on, repentance would be between myself, loved ones possibly affected by my actions, and the Lord.
So, why is a confession necessary in these situations? What is the doctrinal basis for speaking to a bishop about any particular sin? It is between the Lord and the sinner, no?

Colly Wolly · 04-02-2006, 03:14 AM

I am under the impression that Word of Wisdom issues can be handled between the individual and the Lord. I maybe wrong. The other day I got some Ben & Jerry's ice cream Dublin Mudslide. Thought the coffee described in the flavor description was coffee flavoring. Halfway through the pint I read the fine print ingredients. Sure enough, coffee was one of them. I finished the pint. Do I need to tell my bishop?

non sequitur · 04-02-2006, 03:22 AM

I have never been a big believer in confessing sins to a bishop. If you feel like you have sinned and want to repent, then simply change your behavior. Unloading your sins to a bishop is useless unless you think he can help you overcome issues with which you are stuggling.

Colly Wolly · 04-02-2006, 03:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by non sequitur

I have never been a big believer in confessing sins to a bishop. If you feel like you have sinned and want to repent, then simply change your behavior. Unloading your sins to a bishop is useless unless you think he can help you overcome issues with which you are stuggling.

You don't think things like murder or serious sexual sins need to be confessed to a bishop? What about the last question in a temple recommend interview?

Robin · 04-02-2006, 04:00 AM

I believe that these rules exist to protect the church, and have little to do with the individual. The church doesn't want to accidently call someone to be a stake president if that person has a secret sexual history that could eventually embarass the church, and cause members to question whether or not callings are really divinely inspired.

I am sure that there are some cases where the idea of having to confess a sin is an incentive not to sin again. Maybe that is the way God works... terrorizing people into good behavior.

non sequitur · 04-02-2006, 04:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stick It In Him

Quote:

Originally Posted by non sequitur

I have never been a big believer in confessing sins to a bishop. If you feel like you have sinned and want to repent, then simply change your behavior. Unloading your sins to a bishop is useless unless you think he can help you overcome issues with which you are stuggling.

You don't think things like murder or serious sexual sins need to be confessed to a bishop? What about the last question in a temple recommend interview?

I simply don't see the benefit of confessing things to a bishop. The bishop isn't the one that forgives you. It just seems like an unneccesary step.

Robin · 04-02-2006, 04:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by non sequitur

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stick It In Him

Quote:

Originally Posted by non sequitur

I have never been a big believer in confessing sins to a bishop. If you feel like you have sinned and want to repent, then simply change your behavior. Unloading your sins to a bishop is useless unless you think he can help you overcome issues with which you are stuggling.

You don't think things like murder or serious sexual sins need to be confessed to a bishop? What about the last question in a temple recommend interview?

I simply don't see the benefit of confessing things to a bishop. The bishop isn't the one that forgives you. It just seems like an unneccesary step.

Good point non sequitur. Is God really going to fail to forgive a person who really repents and has a change of heart, all because he doesn't confess to the bishop? I have a friend who slept with his girlfriend before they married. He felt terrible, but it was a sin with no victim. The couple was going to marry, which represents the ultimate 'change of heart' in these cases, and this one transgression wasn't going to change their love or their plans. But the couple felt bad, and confessed to the Bishop. The Bishop gave the couple a choice -- shotgun wedding, or face a church court. Confession turned their wedding into a mockery, shaming all of the parents, and leaving a lot of bitter feelings for everyone on a day that should have been something great.

IMO, confession of sin to an ecclesiastical leader is a necessary evil, to protect the church from embarrassment.

Colly Wolly · 04-02-2006, 04:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by non sequitur

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stick It In Him

Quote:

Originally Posted by non sequitur

I have never been a big believer in confessing sins to a bishop. If you feel like you have sinned and want to repent, then simply change your behavior. Unloading your sins to a bishop is useless unless you think he can help you overcome issues with which you are stuggling.

You don't think things like murder or serious sexual sins need to be confessed to a bishop? What about the last question in a temple recommend interview?

I simply don't see the benefit of confessing things to a bishop. The bishop isn't the one that forgives you. It just seems like an unneccesary step.

Do you only follow the rules you approve of or see the benefit for? I do not claim to be the perfect member by the way (or 100% agree with every doctrine in the Church), just trying to understand you better is all.

RockyBalboa · 04-03-2006, 04:15 AM

There are certain kinds of behavior where true repentance cannot be gone through or received unless they go through the step of working with and speaking with their Bishop. To say one can't see the benefit of confessing to a Bishop is a very revealing statement in and of itself. Some people just refuse to be humble and open and will instead look at it as some form of manipulation and/or conspiracy.

Now to what extent we should confess, I can't lay claim to to be all-knowing.

However, if it is something that we know would prevent us from taking the sacrament on a long term basis, or would put our church standing in question,,,and I think inside if we're legitimately honest with ourselves then we'll know if it is or not.

In regards to your situation, I honestly wouldn't know what to do and it would be tough to know in a lot of situations how to react to that.

But in general most Bishops I know are kind, loving, understanding men who are simply trying to do the best they can with the mantle they've been blessed with. Some people will confess to their Bishop and then not like what they hear, and ultimately that individual's true feelings and intentions are exposed... and instead of accepting personal responsilbility will suddenly turn everything around and become bitter. It's a real sad phenomenon that just about every Bishop deals with on a continual basis.

Because of having to deal with that alone, and I hope this doesn't sound bad, but I hope I'm NEVER called to be a Bishop.

Jeff Lebowski · 04-03-2006, 04:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RockyBalboa

Because of having to deal with that alone, and I hope this doesn't sound bad, but I hope I'm NEVER called to be a Bishop.

Amen, brother. A-M-E-N.

04-02-2006, 01:23 AM	#1
Fumamota McChopperdave Junior Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: SLC Posts: 25	Repentance and confession One thing that I've always wondered about, why is it necessary to confess to a bishop/GA a sin that one has already overcome, prayed about, and felt a confirming spirit that he has been forgiven? Personal story: before the mish in my youth, I was a lover of the ganja and the pale ale. It kept me out of the mission field for awhile; I continued to attend church, but felt continually niggled by guilt that I had a horrible habit that was holding me back spiritually. I struggled for a couple of years, and finally put the stuff away. I read the BOM, found myself spiritually, gained a real testimony, and decided to file mission papers. It had been 8 months since I'd touched anything when during pre-paper sending bishop interviews I disclosed my Word o' wisdom breakages in my youth. I was ashamed to admit these things I'd hidden from the ward community for years. I felt awful about things... and the bishop responded by giving me the b**** slapping of my life. He said that I had no honor, and that if he had his way I wouldn't be allowed to serve a mission. He laid into me like no other. I told myself after that experience, never again. Before the interview, I had felt that I had worked on the problem and found repentance and help through the spirit. Afterwards, I felt like Judas. I decided that from then on, repentance would be between myself, loved ones possibly affected by my actions, and the Lord. So, why is a confession necessary in these situations? What is the doctrinal basis for speaking to a bishop about any particular sin? It is between the Lord and the sinner, no?

04-02-2006, 03:22 AM	#3
non sequitur Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 1,964	I have never been a big believer in confessing sins to a bishop. If you feel like you have sinned and want to repent, then simply change your behavior. Unloading your sins to a bishop is useless unless you think he can help you overcome issues with which you are stuggling. __________________ ...You've been under attack for days, there's a soldier down, he's wounded, gangrene's setting in, 'Who's used all the penicillin?' 'Oh, Mark Paxson sir, he's got knob rot off of some tart.'" - Gareth Keenan

04-02-2006, 03:14 AM	#2
Colly Wolly Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 1,281	I am under the impression that Word of Wisdom issues can be handled between the individual and the Lord. I maybe wrong. The other day I got some Ben & Jerry's ice cream Dublin Mudslide. Thought the coffee described in the flavor description was coffee flavoring. Halfway through the pint I read the fine print ingredients. Sure enough, coffee was one of them. I finished the pint. Do I need to tell my bishop?

04-02-2006, 04:00 AM	#5
Robin Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 961	I believe that these rules exist to protect the church, and have little to do with the individual. The church doesn't want to accidently call someone to be a stake president if that person has a secret sexual history that could eventually embarass the church, and cause members to question whether or not callings are really divinely inspired. I am sure that there are some cases where the idea of having to confess a sin is an incentive not to sin again. Maybe that is the way God works... terrorizing people into good behavior.

04-03-2006, 04:15 AM	#9
RockyBalboa Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Salt Lake City Posts: 7,297	There are certain kinds of behavior where true repentance cannot be gone through or received unless they go through the step of working with and speaking with their Bishop. To say one can't see the benefit of confessing to a Bishop is a very revealing statement in and of itself. Some people just refuse to be humble and open and will instead look at it as some form of manipulation and/or conspiracy. Now to what extent we should confess, I can't lay claim to to be all-knowing. However, if it is something that we know would prevent us from taking the sacrament on a long term basis, or would put our church standing in question,,,and I think inside if we're legitimately honest with ourselves then we'll know if it is or not. In regards to your situation, I honestly wouldn't know what to do and it would be tough to know in a lot of situations how to react to that. But in general most Bishops I know are kind, loving, understanding men who are simply trying to do the best they can with the mantle they've been blessed with. Some people will confess to their Bishop and then not like what they hear, and ultimately that individual's true feelings and intentions are exposed... and instead of accepting personal responsilbility will suddenly turn everything around and become bitter. It's a real sad phenomenon that just about every Bishop deals with on a continual basis. Because of having to deal with that alone, and I hope this doesn't sound bad, but I hope I'm NEVER called to be a Bishop.