Worst lyrics all time? - cougarguard.com — unofficial BYU Cougars / LDS sports, football, basketball forum and message board

BarbaraGordon · 11-09-2006, 09:57 PM

Just plain weird:
"I don't think that I can take it 'cause it took so long to bake it..."
MacArthur Park, Richard Harris

Failed attempt at poetic imagery:
"bubblegum tongue"???
Your body is a wonderland, John Mayer

runner up:
"The morning sun is shining like a red rubber ball" (Apologies to Paul Simon, who wrote the song)
Red Rubber Ball, Cyrkle

Worst use of repetition:
"Tell me have you ever really, really, really, really, really, really...."
Have you ever loved a woman? Bryan Adams

grammatical breakdown:
"No I cannot forget from where it is that I come from"
Small Town, John (Cougar) Mellancamp

overall tripe:
Wake Up Little Susie, Everly Brothers

TheSizzle36 · 11-09-2006, 10:10 PM

Absolute worst famous athlete reference:

Nelly Furtado's "Promiscuous Girl"

Hey is that the truth or are you talking trash
Is your game M.V.P. like Steve Nash

I like the beat to that song, but the lyrics are so incredibly horrible that it makes that song so painful to listen to.

hyrum · 11-09-2006, 10:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lisa.Kinzer

Any nominations?

overall tripe:
Wake Up Little Susie, Everly Brothers

Tripe award should go to "Muskrat Love"
Runner up
"Popcorn Popping on the Apricot Tree"

MikeWaters · 11-09-2006, 10:26 PM

This is a good one. I would play it really loud to annoy Farrah.

Quote:

Havin' my baby
What a lovely way of sayin'
How much you love me
Havin' my baby
What a lovely way of sayin'
What you're thinkin' of me
I can see it, face is glowin'
I can see in your eyes
I'm happy you know it

[Both:]
That you're havin' my baby

[Paul:]
You're the woman I love
And I love what it's doin' to ya

[Both:]
Havin' my baby

[Paul:]
You're a woman in love
And I love what's goin' through ya

[Paul:]
The need inside you
I see it showin'
Whoa, the seed inside ya
Baby, do you feel it growin'
Are you happy you know it
That you're

[Both:]
Havin' my baby

[Odia:]
I'm a woman in love
And I love what it's doin' to me

[Both:]
Havin' my baby

[Odia:]
I'm a woman in love
And I love what's goin' through me

[Paul:]
Didn't have to keep it
Wouldn't put ya through it
You could have swept it from you life
But you wouldn't do it
No, you wouldn't do it

[Both:]
And you're havin' my baby

[Odia:]
I'm a woman in love
And I love what it's doin' to me

[Both:]
Havin' my baby

[Odia:]
I'm a woman in love
And I love what's goin' through me

[Paul:]
Havin' my baby (havin' my baby)
What a lovely way of sayin'
How much you love me

[Paul:]
Havin' my baby
(havin' my baby)

[Odia:]
I'm a woman in love
And I love what's goin' through me

BarbaraGordon · 11-09-2006, 10:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hyrum

Tripe award should go to "Muskrat Love"
Runner up
"Popcorn Popping on the Apricot Tree"

I have to admit, I did consider Muskrat Love...

Jeff Lebowski · 11-09-2006, 10:48 PM

So many choices, so little time. Amen to all the above.

Just about anything out of Nashville these days is automatically a contender. But you have to give a lifetime achievement award to Neil Diamond. Mr. Cheese himself. Here are some of my "favorites":

Porcupine Pie

Words and Music by Neil Diamond

Porcupine pie, porcupine pie, porcupine pie,
Vanilla soup, a double scoop please.
No, maybe I want, maybe I won't, maybe I will.
The titti fruit, with fruity blue cheese.

Ah, but porcupine pie, porcupine pie, porcupine pie,
Don't let it get on your jeans, I know it sounds a little strange,
but you got to eat it with gloves--or your hands will turn green.

Ah, but porcupine pie, porcupine pie, porcupine pie,
It weaves its way through my dreams,
And I do believe I'm gonna have one and leave enough room for dessert,
chicken ripple ice cream.

HEARTLIGHT

Written by Neil Diamond, Burt Bacharach and Carole Bayer Sager

Come back again
I want you to stay next time
'Cause sometimes the world ain't kind
When people get lost like you and me
I just made a friend
A friend is someone you need
But now that he had to go away
I still feel the words that he might say
Turn on your heartlight
Let it shine whereever you go
Let it make a happy glow
For all the world to see
Turn on your heartlight
In the middle of a young boy's dream
Don't wake me up too soon
Gonna take a ride across the moon
You and me
He's lookin' for home
'Cause everyone needs a place
And home's the most excellent place of all
And I'll be right here if you should call me
Turn on your heartlight
Let it shine whereever you go
Let it make a happy glow
For all the world to see
Turn on your heartlight
In the middle of a young boy's dream
Don't wake me up too soon
Gonna take a ride across the moon
You and me
Turn on you heartlight now
Turn on you heartlight now

BarbaraGordon · 11-09-2006, 11:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jeff Lebowski

So many choices, so little time. Amen to all the above.
But you have to give a lifetime achievement award to Neil Diamond. Mr. Cheese himself. Here are some of my "favorites":

How could I forget Neil?? Clearly an oversight. Another good one:

"I am I said to no one there and no one heard at all not even the chair..."

good stuff.

mpfunk · 11-09-2006, 11:07 PM

Look since I do not want to bring up the LDS Religion's ugly history, I will exclude the Mormon Rap from this list. With that exclusion I have easily the worst lyrics to any song right here for you.

L.F.O. (Light Funky Ones) - Summer Girls

Yeah...I like it when the girls stop by.. In the summer
Do you remember, Do you remember?
...when we met..That summer??

[Chorus:]
New Kids On The block,had a bunch of hits
Chinese food makes me sick.
And I think it's fly when girls stop by for the summer,for the summer
I like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch,
I'd take her if I had one wish,
But she's been gone since that summer..
Since that summer

[Verse 1:]
Hip Hop Marmalade spic And span,
Met you one summer and it all began
You're the best girl that I ever did see,
The great Larry Bird Jersey 33
When you take a sip you buzz like a hornet
Billy Shakespeare wrote a whole bunch of sonnets
Call me Willy Whistle cause I can't speak baby
Something in your eyes went and drove me crazy
Now I can't forget you and it makes me mad,
Left one day and never came back
Stayed all summer then went back home,
Macauly Culkin wasn't Home Alone
Fell deep in love,but now we ain't speaking
Michael J Fox was Alex P Keaton
When I met you I said my name was Rich
You look like a girl from Abercrombie and Fitch

[Chorus:]
New Kids On The block,had a bunch of hits
Chinese food makes me sick.
And I think it's fly when girls stop by for the summer,for the summer
I like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch,
I'd take her if I had one wish,
But she's been gone since that summer..
Since that summer

[Verse 2:]
Cherry Pez,cold crush,rock star boogie
Used to hate school so I had to play hookie,
Always been hip to the B-boY Style
Known to act wild and make girls smile,
Love New Edition and the Candy Girl
Remind me of you because you rock my world
You come from Georgia where the peaches grow
They drink lemonade and speak real slow
You love hip hop and rock n roll
Dad took off when you were 4 years old
There was a good man named Paul Revere
I feel much better baby when you're near
You love fun dip and cherry Coke,
I like the way you laugh when I tell a joke
When I met you I said my name was Rich
You look like a girl from Abercrombie and Fitch

[Repeat Chorus]

[Bridge:]
In the summertime girls got it going on,
Shake and wiggle to a hip hop song
Summertime girls are the kind I like,
I'll steal your honey like I stole your bike

[Verse 3]
Bugaloo shrimp and pogo sticks
My mind takes me back there oh so quick
Let you off the hook like my man Mr. Limpet
Think about that summer and I bug,cause I miss it
Like the color purple,macaroni and cheese,
Ruby red slippers and a bunch of trees
Call you up but whats the use
I like Kevin Bacon,but I hate Footloose
Came in the door I said it before,I think I'm over you
but I'm really not sure
When I met you I said my name was Rich
You look like a girl from Abercrombie and Fitch

[Repeat Chorus]

[Bridge:]
In the summer girls come and summer girls go
Some are worth while and some are so so,
Summer girls come and summer girls go
Some are worth while and some are so so,
Summertime girls got it going on
Shake and wiggle to a hip hop song
Summertime girls are the kind I like
I'll steal your honey like I stole your bike

[Repeat Chorus]

creekster · 11-09-2006, 11:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lisa.Kinzer

How could I forget Neil?? Clearly an oversight. Another good one:

"I am I said to no one there and no one heard at all not even the chair..."

good stuff.

You stole my thunder. Many of the other goofy lyrics are self-consciously goofy and so I am not sure if they really count. But this gem, the utter isolation, described by the poignant refernce to unfeeling furniture, is so bad precisely becasue it is so earnestly sincere. Neil could really craft a nice pop tune but man did some of his lyrics stink.

ute4ever · 11-09-2006, 11:15 PM

Neil Diamond was the worst. He would say anything just to make it rhyme.

Quote:

I am, I said ... to no one there ... and no one heard ... not even the chair

11-09-2006, 09:57 PM	#1
BarbaraGordon Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Gotham City Posts: 7,157	Worst lyrics all time? Just plain weird: "I don't think that I can take it 'cause it took so long to bake it..." MacArthur Park, Richard Harris Failed attempt at poetic imagery: "bubblegum tongue"??? Your body is a wonderland, John Mayer runner up: "The morning sun is shining like a red rubber ball" (Apologies to Paul Simon, who wrote the song) Red Rubber Ball, Cyrkle Worst use of repetition: "Tell me have you ever really, really, really, really, really, really...." Have you ever loved a woman? Bryan Adams grammatical breakdown: "No I cannot forget from where it is that I come from" Small Town, John (Cougar) Mellancamp overall tripe: Wake Up Little Susie, Everly Brothers Last edited by BarbaraGordon; 04-24-2007 at 12:25 AM.

11-09-2006, 10:48 PM	#6
Jeff Lebowski Charon Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: In the heart of darkness (Provo) Posts: 9,564	So many choices, so little time. Amen to all the above. Just about anything out of Nashville these days is automatically a contender. But you have to give a lifetime achievement award to Neil Diamond. Mr. Cheese himself. Here are some of my "favorites": Porcupine Pie Words and Music by Neil Diamond Porcupine pie, porcupine pie, porcupine pie, Vanilla soup, a double scoop please. No, maybe I want, maybe I won't, maybe I will. The titti fruit, with fruity blue cheese. Ah, but porcupine pie, porcupine pie, porcupine pie, Don't let it get on your jeans, I know it sounds a little strange, but you got to eat it with gloves--or your hands will turn green. Ah, but porcupine pie, porcupine pie, porcupine pie, It weaves its way through my dreams, And I do believe I'm gonna have one and leave enough room for dessert, chicken ripple ice cream. HEARTLIGHT Written by Neil Diamond, Burt Bacharach and Carole Bayer Sager Come back again I want you to stay next time 'Cause sometimes the world ain't kind When people get lost like you and me I just made a friend A friend is someone you need But now that he had to go away I still feel the words that he might say Turn on your heartlight Let it shine whereever you go Let it make a happy glow For all the world to see Turn on your heartlight In the middle of a young boy's dream Don't wake me up too soon Gonna take a ride across the moon You and me He's lookin' for home 'Cause everyone needs a place And home's the most excellent place of all And I'll be right here if you should call me Turn on your heartlight Let it shine whereever you go Let it make a happy glow For all the world to see Turn on your heartlight In the middle of a young boy's dream Don't wake me up too soon Gonna take a ride across the moon You and me Turn on you heartlight now Turn on you heartlight now __________________ "... the arc of the universe is long but it bends toward justice." Martin Luther King, Jr.

11-09-2006, 10:10 PM	#2
TheSizzle36 Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 3,786	Absolute worst famous athlete reference: Nelly Furtado's "Promiscuous Girl" Hey is that the truth or are you talking trash Is your game M.V.P. like Steve Nash I like the beat to that song, but the lyrics are so incredibly horrible that it makes that song so painful to listen to.

11-09-2006, 11:07 PM	#8
mpfunk Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Portland, OR Posts: 2,619	Look since I do not want to bring up the LDS Religion's ugly history, I will exclude the Mormon Rap from this list. With that exclusion I have easily the worst lyrics to any song right here for you. L.F.O. (Light Funky Ones) - Summer Girls Yeah...I like it when the girls stop by.. In the summer Do you remember, Do you remember? ...when we met..That summer?? [Chorus:] New Kids On The block,had a bunch of hits Chinese food makes me sick. And I think it's fly when girls stop by for the summer,for the summer I like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch, I'd take her if I had one wish, But she's been gone since that summer.. Since that summer [Verse 1:] Hip Hop Marmalade spic And span, Met you one summer and it all began You're the best girl that I ever did see, The great Larry Bird Jersey 33 When you take a sip you buzz like a hornet Billy Shakespeare wrote a whole bunch of sonnets Call me Willy Whistle cause I can't speak baby Something in your eyes went and drove me crazy Now I can't forget you and it makes me mad, Left one day and never came back Stayed all summer then went back home, Macauly Culkin wasn't Home Alone Fell deep in love,but now we ain't speaking Michael J Fox was Alex P Keaton When I met you I said my name was Rich You look like a girl from Abercrombie and Fitch [Chorus:] New Kids On The block,had a bunch of hits Chinese food makes me sick. And I think it's fly when girls stop by for the summer,for the summer I like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch, I'd take her if I had one wish, But she's been gone since that summer.. Since that summer [Verse 2:] Cherry Pez,cold crush,rock star boogie Used to hate school so I had to play hookie, Always been hip to the B-boY Style Known to act wild and make girls smile, Love New Edition and the Candy Girl Remind me of you because you rock my world You come from Georgia where the peaches grow They drink lemonade and speak real slow You love hip hop and rock n roll Dad took off when you were 4 years old There was a good man named Paul Revere I feel much better baby when you're near You love fun dip and cherry Coke, I like the way you laugh when I tell a joke When I met you I said my name was Rich You look like a girl from Abercrombie and Fitch [Repeat Chorus] [Bridge:] In the summertime girls got it going on, Shake and wiggle to a hip hop song Summertime girls are the kind I like, I'll steal your honey like I stole your bike [Verse 3] Bugaloo shrimp and pogo sticks My mind takes me back there oh so quick Let you off the hook like my man Mr. Limpet Think about that summer and I bug,cause I miss it Like the color purple,macaroni and cheese, Ruby red slippers and a bunch of trees Call you up but whats the use I like Kevin Bacon,but I hate Footloose Came in the door I said it before,I think I'm over you but I'm really not sure When I met you I said my name was Rich You look like a girl from Abercrombie and Fitch [Repeat Chorus] [Bridge:] In the summer girls come and summer girls go Some are worth while and some are so so, Summer girls come and summer girls go Some are worth while and some are so so, Summertime girls got it going on Shake and wiggle to a hip hop song Summertime girls are the kind I like I'll steal your honey like I stole your bike [Repeat Chorus]